Gift Etiquette
<b>Q</b>: How do I get the word out about my registry? Can I put it on my invitation?
<b>A</B.: Make sure you tell your parents, attendants, and key friends where you are registered; it is their job to spread the word. You can give invitation inserts to your honor attendants to put in your shower invitations or to hand to anyone who asks. Don't ever print where you are registered on your invitation-some people are against that. Whether you include registry inserts in your invitations is up to you; mind you, some people are against it. One of the best ways to get the word out is to create a wedding Web page (you can do this easily at www.TheKnot.com/pwp) and link your registries from there. You e-mail guests with your Web .page, and amid the rest of the information is a link to or listing of your registries.
<b>Q</b>: How do we let guests know we want cash instead of gifts?
<b>A</b>: Many guests will give you cash, without your having to ask-it's traditional in many parts of the country and among many ethnic groups, too (Chinese and Italian, to name but two). Otherwise, the best you can do is put your parents and wedding party on alert that if guests ask them what you'd most like for your wedding, they should say money. Then just cross your fingers! You should still register as a backup. Another strategy is to register for your honeymoon trip or for a down payment on a home. On TheKnot.com you can also register for gift certificates-for dinner at your favorite restaurant, car payments, classes- so guests will still feel they are getting you something specific, and you get what you really need.
<b>Q</b>: When do we need to start sending out thank-you notes for gifts, and do you have any advice?
<b>A</b>: Start sending out thank-you notes ASAP It will feel like less of a chore if you do it as gifts come in, instead of waiting until you've got a hundred of them! Tips:.
Time it right. Try to send thank-yous for gifts received before the wedding within two weeks; after the wedding, within a month after the honeymoon. Do your best-and remember, it's never too late to send them.
Keep track. Use a handy-dandy gift log to record each guest's name, their gift, and the date you sent your note.
Do a few at a time. Getting them all done in one sitting won't happen.
Divide and conquer. The bride does her family and friends, the groom does his. Divide the mutual-friend pile evenly, or if one of you has a huge family and the other one's is pretty small, have the small-family person take care of friends.
Sign off. Etiquette says that only the writer should sign, mentioning his or her spouse in the note ("Todd and l "), but lots of couples sign both their names.
<b>Q</b>: Are guests supposed to bring gifts to the wedding or ship them to the couple?
<b>A</b>: Most guests will know that the best thing to do is have gifts shipped to the address you give your registry (make sure they have the correct address-yours, your parents'-and ask that salespeople mention it when guests buy something). In some parts of the country however, it is still traditional to bring gifts to the reception. To plan for it, arrange with the site manager for a safe place to put them-such as an attended coatroom, or a room or closet that can be locked. The best man and maid of honor are often responsible for collecting gift checks brought to the wedding.
<b>Q</b>: What do we do about damaged gifts?
<b>A</b>: lf something arrives broken, check the box. If the gift's been sent from your registry, call their customer service department to arrange for a replacement to be sent to you-there shouldn't be any charge.
Courtesy of <a class='navitem2' href='http://theknot.com'>The Knot </a> via <a class='navitem2' href='http://scrippsmedia.com'>Scripps Media</a>
