Surviving the Bridal Battlefield
Cars, Catering and other crises
by Melissa Borden
Two weeks till the wedding and we’ve decided to complicate things. Not only are we planning and paying for our own wedding, but we’ve decided that the housing market is hot and we’re purchasing a house. It started out as one of those ‘what-if’ things – we thought we would just start looking and then later we’d have a better idea of what we were getting into. I can’t believe I was so naïve. The closing is set for the week of the wedding. Monday we close on the house; Sunday we’re married.
It’s with these life changing stressors in mind that I take you into the two week countdown. That week started out like any other. I had a proposal for one of my larger advertisers. Jason was working at the golf course. Things were good. Then, all hell broke loose.
Sunday morning, on his way to the golf course to work, Jason’s car won’t start. Sounds like the starter. He didn’t have time to investigate further, and I take him to work. Then, I tow his car to the local mechanic. And $500 later, the alternator and battery are replaced and in working order. I now understand the meaning of the phrase ‘save for a rainy day’ – cause when it rains it pours.
Next, I got a phone call that my mom was suddenly coming into town with my step dad because he had a business meeting nearby. Not a big deal, but it means dress fittings and dinner amid an already crazy week. Then, my largest advertiser fires his sister, who happened to also be his marketing director, and suddenly stops advertising. My dad calls with news he’s looking into other places for his tuxedo (instead of the pre-set plans we made for him.) And to top it off, the caterer calls with a crisis. My head is already exploding.
Keep in mind I have had catering plans in place since October. It’s now June. This is the third sales person we’ve dealt with at the catering company. Her name is Kara. She calls to introduce herself, explain that my last contact is no longer with the company and Kara voices her concern we will not have enough food for the wedding. At this point, I have a small aneurysm.
With my mom in town, we set a meeting with the catering contact and try to begin to understand why the caterer, whose supposed job it is to prepare enough food, now thinks we will not have an adequate amount. It had something to do with the number of pieces per person for the type of event we were having. While I could somewhat appreciate their explanation and their attempt to offer their guidance and expertise, I was pretty upset we were having this conversation two weeks until the event rather than three months ago.
After going round and round with the catering sales person we finally reach a compromise that seems reasonable and will keep the costs down. Kara promises to fight to keep our compromise and get the final ok from her boss. I promise to discuss with my better half as soon as I hear their final proposal. The proposal comes and Kara’s boss isn’t so compromising. The option Kara and I discussed isn’t going to work either. And if the venue where we’re to be wed didn’t require we use this caterer, I would have seriously considered canning them.
So, I go round and round with Kara’s boss. I take little solace in hearing the words ‘well, it’s better we’re discussing this now than the day of the event.’ To which I reply, ‘we shouldn’t be discussing this at all. This should have been taken care of three months ago.’ And I lose my mind a little more with each heated conversation. Finally, I ask to see two proposals and take them to Jason. It’s finally Friday at the end of this hellish week and Jason and I sit down to discuss the catering crisis. He takes a look at the options laid out before us – one changes our original menu completely and isn’t the ideal image we had in mind. The other adds the necessary food to make the caterer comfortable and adds a bit to our bottom line. Jason, my loving mate, future husband, carefully considers these proposals. I wait for his reply, eager to hear his angst reflect my own frustration at the whole ordeal. And he says, ‘well, we’ve saved for it. It’s our wedding day. Let’s just go with what makes the caterer comfortable.’
It was then, I realized three things: One, the caterers would have had a much nicer time talking with Jason. Two, I’m lucky to have such a wonderful understanding man. Because three, weddings really do make you crazy.
